The Passing of Leo McGarry - As Hard as that of John Spencer

On tonight's episode of West Wing, they dealt with the heart attack and death of the character Leo McGarry, played by the brilliant actor John Spencer who died unexpectedly of a heart attack a few months ago.

I liked John from the first time I saw him, I believe in L.A. Law, or at least that's the first thing I remember him from. He not only was a terrific actor but he had a nice homey quality to him and a comfortable feel to him... so you wanted to bring him into your home via the TV. Like a friend or an uncle, I always would sit back with a smile when he would appear in a movie and would just watch him play great scenes. Often they were bread and butter characters, not the big splashy ones, not the main character, but one you always want around.

In West Wing, he was great as Chief of Staff and as a middle-aged man with problems. But the greatest thing about Leo was the steadfast loyalty and great friendship he had with President Bartlett played by Martin Sheen. I make no bones that my favorite shows have always been and will always be the buddy shows. I like stories about great friends who love and care about each other and watch each other's backs, figuratively, and sometimes even literally. I love reading books about adventures of buddies as well and love to incorporate relationships like that in my writing.

But you don't often get to see life-long friendships between strong men with families who are not so young anymore. But who support and care about each other. I think one of my favorite moments from the show was when Leo's alcoholic past was revealed and he was going to resign for the good of the president and Bartlett wouldn't let him. The message was clear: I don't care what people say, we'll get through this together, like we have always done. And my heart almost broke when they had their big fight and their friendship was ripped apart.

Yes, I know they are TV characters and not real, but it felt like friends I cared about were being ripped away from each other and from me. It was a painful time.

Can't think of anything more painful than watching Leo walk through the forest alone and hurting -- not even Leo's heartattack there in that place.


I got to meet John and his lovely lady at the 2005 Emmys a few months before he died (see the above photo). I got to tell him how much I valued the characters he has created over the years and how special it was to see a life-long friendship between two seasoned men. He liked that, too. I'm glad I got to tell him that because we all think we have more time than we do to tell people we care -- whether they are family or friends or even strangers who touch you through their craft. And then you don't.

I debated going to hear him speak at the seminar he had at the Learning Annex a few weeks before his death... but life intervened and one thing lead to another and I ended up saying, catch you next time. Except there was no next time. And I'm so sorry I didn't take advantage of the opportunity I had.

I was very sad and depressed when he died, shocked even. Because it was too soon. I wanted more great characters and more of the special friendship. I even wanted to see him and Jimmy Smits win the presidency. It was hard for me as a viewer, obviously much harder for his friends and family.

So that brings us back to West Wing and wondering how they were going to handle John's death in the context of the show. I remember Martin giving a little speech about how they would miss him but felt that the best tribute to John's memory was to play out his final episodes. Yeah, I can agree to that... I want to see them.

At first, not knowing what was going to happen when, I watched the shows with apprehension, steeling myself for the moment... except it didn't come... and my sadness over his death sort of dissipated over the course of watching him. Oh, in the head I knew it was coming, but when I watched, I'd forget. Then of course there were the episodes that Leo wasn't in, but they talked about him. Yes, I knew why that was, but in essence he was still there in spirit so I got lulled into believing. That is until the inevitable happened and we get the scene. The network made a spoiler out of it by putting it in their previews, but it gave me a whole week to get used to what was coming... or so I thought.

Because I learned that it was just as difficult to lose Leo as a character as it was to lose the actor. Maybe even more so. I didn't really know John Spencer, but I did know Leo McGarry, every week for years. And all the emotions of being sad and depressed when John Spencer died came flooding back for Leo. There will probably never be another character quite like him or a friendship quite like Leo and Bartlett had, and for that I cry. For I am poorer for the loss.